Because I, on the other hand, take forever to get my brain to actually fire impulse to the neurons in my voicebox. I do know what I want to say but I always fear that it's not something wanted to be heard and that it's better for it to just float in my head until I myself forget about it only to be reminded when I catch a glimpse of you. Am I really that after your acceptance?
Why am I so afraid of facing you and seeing you shun me directly? Why haven't I grown numb? Why haven't I let go? Why haven't I outgrown this joke of a red string? I thought I had grabbed the ends of it and pulled it untied but I realize now that all I did was to tighten it even more.